As a father and a teacher, sometimes I find my child's behavior or my students are not in line with expectations. But the problem is whether they understand the consequences of their behavior and actions? Are we as parents and teachers, has provided an understanding of the possible impact on them or the people around them.
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Positive parenting can have a sense that you provide insights regarding a possible consequences of one's actions. Disciplining children need to be considered carefully that you are trying to prevent your child is doing the wrong thing compared to what effect and punishment would you give when your child make mistakes. but keep in mind that discipline children not by yelling.
As of this writing in January 2016, I have 2 daughters aged 5 years and 1 year. I also taught at a private school senior high school level. Discipline that I apply to my children of course different from the discipline applied to my students. When you're interacting with a toddler, make sure you give positive inputs and avoid using the word "No" because this will stimulate their minds to do so. Make sure they get the reason why you did not suggest, not prohibit, on the actions they will do.
According to a book on the work of Alan Yip FUNtastic Parenting I read, there are three styles in parenting is Permissive, Authoritarian and Authoritative.
Permissive: No limits and no rules
At this parenting style you give freedom to your child until they make a mistake. After that you forbid them to do so. The question is, if it turns out they make a fatal mistake, would you still love them. If you find that your daughter was pregnant, would you still accept it as your child? If your son jailed for killing or stealing would you still recognize them as your child?
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On the one hand, this parenting style a positive impact on children because you give great confidence about the decisions they make. This parenting style but also give negative effects are great because you do not apply the rules and limitations are obvious. Deciplining children through this parenting style is only impressed kidding. Even if the rules and restrictions that exist, you do not apply it consistently. As a result, most children who are educated through this parenting style would seem uncontrollable.
Authoritarian: orientation on penalties
At this parenting style, the opinion of a child will not apply. The parents who arrange the details of your child's every action. A child is not entitled to have opinions and thoughts. They just need to execute what is commanded parents because the parents felt he be successful in that way and certainly succeed if applied to children. The fact is that if you are deciplining children with violence, then you're printing prospective parents who will adopt violence as a cornerstone of education of parents to their children.
Parents will appreciate the results of an aspiration without considering a process in achieving success. The result of course the child will feel that they need others to be able to listen to the opinions or even devote their laments. The problem is what if it was the children we find people are wrong as the place to lament or idolized the wrong people.
This parenting style also stressed to the punishment that will be given if they make a mistake as a result of not following the orders of parents. They will be closed when the adult individual. They will also be the person who is less motivated to become leaders, because they are used to carry out the command instead of giving orders.
For example:
Parents: "why did you do? Do you have any idea of what you've done? You should be punished ...
Children: they will say in their mind "what did I do? I do not even know if it was not right, you did not warn me. I do not deserve to be punished.
Keep in mind that deciplining children not mean physical punishment when they make mistakes. You need to provide an understanding of the risks that may result from their actions.
Authoritative: listen and discuss
Deciplining children means providing an understanding of the risks of acts that are being or will they do not just what they have done. Children need to know that every action has a consequence either positive or negative. Your child needs to know what you expect of them. You also take the time to hear their questions about why something needs to be done and not done? Or listen to their opinion on a matter. You and your family will be used to solve a problem through discussion. At this stage, your child will feel that their position is important in the family. The result of course they will be used to issue an opinion or giving advice and criticism if they find an error in a system. You need to give honest answers and logical to avoid their dissatisfaction for your answer. Do not let them find out the truth about a matter not of your own mouth.
Conclusion:
Deciplining children means that you explain to something necessary and unnecessary. That there is a consequence of the actions that are being or will be doing and the potential losses that may be experienced by others. Do not get used to punish your child without telling something that should not be done. You also need to give an example that you also do not perform acts that should not be made earlier. Make sure your children see for yourself that you do not do. Do not let you say you do, but instead
